


Sucker Love

by patio_sunlight



Series: Branches [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: 5 Times, Angst, Complicated Relationships, F/M, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, M/M, One-Sided Keith/Lance (Voltron), Sexual Content, Swearing, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-14
Updated: 2018-10-14
Packaged: 2019-07-15 12:02:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16062713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/patio_sunlight/pseuds/patio_sunlight
Summary: (Timeline 1)The one where Keith and Lance are unhappy.





	Sucker Love

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't actually watched anything past s6, so I'm trying to be vague with my timelines. (I just, I'm not really into Allurance, even though I am writing a whole 5 part series about it. The concept is fine, I just really don't want to watch it's execution.)
> 
> Reading Klangst is never fun, but I promise you, the sad parts need to be told so that the happy parts don't seem like wish-granting. I want to explore the different ways in which Klance can be great and the ways is can just fuck shit up, because as we have seen, it has already done both.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith returns to find things have changed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First time writing in a while. Sexual content (because who doesn't love sexual content), will be in following chapter(s).

_Sucker love, I always find someone to bruise and leave behind._

* * *

Apparently, he had slightly distorted the memories of his teammates and, upon returning, was surprised to find things felt a bit off.

It was easy to notice the most obvious discrepancies: Hunk didn't really chew his nails when he was nervous, Allura's hair shone a slightly duller undertone of blue, and it was Coran, not Pidge, who often went on tangents about how "modern interplanetary migration patterns and their implications for system boarder policy is utterly fascinating." The differences in Shiro were almost innumerable, but Keith gave himself a pass on that one.

Keith felt out of place; as if he were meeting them all for the first time, again. He had spent two years away, rapidly redefining his sense of self day after day, and returned a new person. But he returned to find them all the same, untouched by maturation, seeming both duller and more complex, going about their business exactly as he had left them. And he had - left them.

The things that were "different", were the things he had, in fact, misremembered. The exaggerated, incorrect behaviors that his mind had let characterize these people threw him off, but the real shock came from the things he hadn't remembered at all. They way he had never noticed how Pidge's body language seemed to relax whenever Hunk was present, or how the cheery expression on Coran's face melted away by the end of each day, making way for a more vague expression only able to be partially described as wistful. But what really uprooted Keith was the things that he hadn't noticed in himself and in Lance.

The memory of their relationship must have been the most hyperbolic because every facet seemed to be shifted off by a degree. The trajectory they had been on, towards something frighteningly undefined, had been abruptly altered, and Keith wished he didn't have a suspicion as to why.

Before he had left, before Shiro's replacement had been planted in their group, he and Lance had been getting closer (so obviously, it would be absurd to deny it.) At the time, Keith was a particularly distrustful person and letting someone get that close had been few and far between. But Lance, much like Shiro had done so long ago, did most of the leg work.

It was Lance, he remembered, not him, who had initiated the first shift in their relationship, even if it was Lance himself who had begun their "friendship" on a sour note. It was Lance, not him, who had come asking for help, asking for reassurance. It was Lance, not him, who had given encouragement and support. It was Lance who had let himself be vulnerable, not him. And maybe that's what had gone wrong.

While Keith was happy to be relieved of Lance's daily pestering, all under the guise of a rivalry, he became aware that he would soon have to reciprocate, exposing some weakness to his teammate. Two years ago, Keith wasn't prepared to do that. For that reason, as well as to address his own burning desire to understand himself, he had left.

"Do you think Allura is using me? Like, is she rebounding?"

It was a question Keith was surprised Lance was asking, and surprised he was asking it at the current moment. They had been cleaning up their combat technique, and at a lull in the session, as they hunched over, hands pressed against their knees, Lance broke the ambiance of soft panting with his question. Keith had sensed Lance's brooding from the fact that they had been interacting for a the greater part of an hour and Lance hadn't, at any point, flashed finger guns.

After taking a moment to process, Keith replied, "What answer do you want to hear?"

A look of worry flashed across Lance's face before settling into a more sincere determination. "An honest one."

"Okay." Keith sighed, "Honestly, she could be." 

As the words left his lips, it was as if Lance's entire body began to droop, and Keith hastily began to clarify.

"I don't know that for sure! I'm just thinking that... if I were in her situation, if I had just been _betrayed_ by someone I trusted, by someone I... loved, I would be desperate to find someone to help me get rid of that feeling."

As Keith talked, nothing in Lance's body language indicated that Keith's words assuaged him in any manner.

Growing frustrated, Keith walked over to Lance, and grasped his shoulders. As Lance looked up in surprise, Keith said, softly, "Lance. Allura  _could_ be using you, yes. We don't know for sure. But what we do know for sure is that- that shit hurts. She's hurting, and she needs a friend - or friends, at least. And - you care for her, and she cares for you. We all do."

As Lance's expression turned smug at his last statement, Keith jerked his hands away from Lance's shoulders and quickly added, "Like in a - a collective ... way. Like, each of us cares for each other, like, all ... together..."

"In a big, seven person, emotional orgy," and the finger guns were back. There was a breath in the conversation as Lance righted himself.

"I'm asking because... I think I'm going to ask Allura out, properly. I just want to make sure I'm not wasting my time."

For a moment Keith was taken aback. Not by what Lance had said, but the immediate, gut churning feeling he had in response. In truth, Keith never thought Lance had a real chance with Allura, making it easy to roll his eyes every time Lance would drop a line or flash a wink, but now Lance and Allura was a real possibility, and if the clench in Keith's chest was any indication, his comfort in the impossibility of those two was about to be rudely disrupted.

Before Keith got out a response, Lance's eyes had brightened and the sincerity in his happiness made Keith's gut lurch again, this time feeling guilty that he was finding Lance's happiness to be something of woe.

More surprisingly, Lance said, "Thank you." And looking heartbreakingly happy, continued, "I didn't really have anyone... on my side when Allura was with Lotor. Pidge and Hunk would just tease me about it. It wasn't that they were mean, I just don't think they cared. So, thank you. For caring."

For the first time since Keith had returned, Lance was sharing an insecurity. Two years ago, Keith wasn't prepared to admit to himself what he could admit now: regardless of his fear of showing weakness, Keith wanted - he wanted desperately - to share that kind of true vulnerability with Lance. It was almost tender moment between the two. Unfortunately, Keith was still thrown off by angry tightening in his chest, and just, sort of, stared blankly toward him.

Keith should have welcomed Lance, offered sympathy or promised to always have his back, and maybe he should have taken the opportunity to finally reciprocate by sharing some weak point. He could have apologized for his absence, for leaving, for running. There were many things Keith _should have_ said at that moment."Yeah. Let's get back to it, huh?" was not one of them, but it's what he went with anyway.

Dumbly, Keith thought that their relationship would pick back up where it had been. Even after their conversation, Keith didn't think their relationship would see much change, but it seemed that Lance had shifted all of his focus to becoming closer to Allura. The moments that Lance once filled with commentary on his hair or clothes or general demeanor, fell still as Lance's attention - the most shocking thing Keith had found himself missing - was given hand and heart to her. Moments of vulnerability, or reassurance were no longer spent - no - wasted on him.

As he watched their relationship form, Keith blamed the churning in his gut on something platonic. He longed for the companionship that this new romantic relationship was impeding. All Keith wanted was to have the friendship that could be made if Lance would just better distribute his time. From his view, the tightening in his lungs was because of something harmless. Why should he be denied an intimate platonic relationship?

Not that his relationship with Shiro was unsatisfying in someway, but there was a certain admiration for the man that Keith never seemed to shake, and, in turn, his need to please him remained. There was a sense of familiarity and ease that came with Lance, a freedom from disappointment that Keith simply couldn't achieve around Shiro. There was something in Lance that Keith was drawn toward.

Where Shiro was someone he wanted be there  _for_ him, Lance was someone he wanted be there  _with_ him. 

But Keith had failed to express any of this to Lance, and Lance had moved on.

**Author's Note:**

> I'll be honest. I never though Klance had a real shot at being canon. I accepted from the beginning that it was a stretch and accept now the direction the writers have chosen to take. But that doesn't stop me from throwing them shade for not having the guts.


End file.
